Protect Love

Protect Love

Refer: http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/tamil-nadu/dalit-youth-ilavarasan-found-dead/article4881007.ece?homepage=true

I lost my sleep last night. They loved each other. She gave up everything to be with a guy who was just 19. He married her. He did not force her into slavery. He did not force her into prostitution. He did not rape her. He did not blackmail her parents’ for their ‘so-called’ wealth. He did not leave her on the streets after few days. He did not harass her. He lived with her with full optimism and only hope as their impartial companion. He found a way to be safe in a different city and ensured safety for his wife. All I see here is TRUE LOVE. Sad they had to run away from their homes but why would anyone do that? That’s because there were so many inequalities set within the system. My major inequality is regarding the law angle here. Why should the Women’s marital age be different from that of Men? If you think, a man is not eligible to get married at the age of 20, why and how can the girl be eligible in any case to get married at 18?

            When I hear people talk about this case in trains (yes, at least we still discuss current affairs) or read about it in twitter, FB pages. I keep hearing a criticism they were immature. Wait a second, do we know what the hardships he went through to fall in love, make a relationship happen, brew trust such that a girl (who is not immature) to believe in him completely, find a way to marry her, negotiate so many financial and personal blockades to live in Chennai, not exploit anyone else and avoid being exploited by bad folks, be compassionate enough to state that he does not dislike his mother in law and among many other things - FACE INDIAN MEDIA and INDIAN POLITICIANS eye to eye when the whole state is debating their personal intimate decisions after a district is left ravaged by caste bigotry and the burden of his Father-in-law’s suicide to be handled emotionally within the couple’s limited privacy. Can anyone say ‘he is Immature’? (Sorry! he WAS immature)? For those who carelessly comment on online news website – “Why can't people just marry within their castes? These types of incidents can be avoided. People do marry outside their castes without thinking, and cause disharmony within all communities. We cannot go against mother nature.” I would like to say why did not the girl’s father think – “what will happen if I commit suicide? Will the marriage be undone? Will there be any communal riots if I commit suicide due to this issue? Will there be innocents killed because of my act?....” I honestly believe the girl’s father was IMMATURE to commit suicide at his age, even though he might not have foreseen the riot. Wasn’t he the IMMATURE person? Couldn’t he have had more faith and courage to face the issue in a matured manner? Even we can argue on the other side, will that solve the issue of Free will and freedom of any soul who cares if they are minors or majors?

                Meanwhile, I was all the while admiring the courage of the guy to stand before the camera and be strong through all the stupid questions asked at him by everyone around. I was wondering how he will be protected after all this. Especially, if you know a political party is after you, anyone including the hardcore criminals goes underground. But this guy was always standing there alone; don’t you think he was not brave enough? (I know few creepy minds will say he was FOOLISH) IGNORE THEM! I believe I know what he was thinking – a fact every guy who had to elope normally goes through – “I did not do anything wrong. I was forced to do few things but they were not wrong. I will fight for my rights and I will stand by my decision.” In a country where our election leaders forget what they say, what they preach and what their ideals stand for, you find a genuine person there. Was being truthful to his emotions so detrimental? How long are we going to continue to judge others by the actions that we DO NOT UNDERSTAND NOR CARE ABOUT?

Let me be clear about my frustration, I am writing here not because of a boy of a certain caste got killed. NO! I am writing here because even in 2013 people cannot live with love and happiness. In this open world, we are still bound by archaic mindsets. We still wish that all our problems will vanish and we can restart a new life tomorrow. We all wish that I want to just close my eyes and my ecosystem gets restored, beggars outside my street vanish, someone will speak about equality and give me my due respect and dignity and when I open my eyes your wish will come true. For our sake, I have to tell you the truth – even amongst all the tons of crazy fairy tales, genius level epics and thousands of religious stories NOT ONE mentioned that things happen by someone’s mere wishes. You may pray as long as you want. Being a part of star dust myself, I guarantee you – Your wish has nothing to do with reality.

You do not get to see any other major parties, religious institutions, communities coming forward to raise voice against the honor crimes. Folks, I have to say if any person does not understand love they are not human, how do you expect a party to have any value if it cannot even tolerate free love?

I am here not for a party, not for a caste, definitely not for a religion, never for a race or class representation. I am writing this blog for the sake of LOVE and whoever has the courage to love. I am here for LOVE and LOVERS. Turning the angle about lovers, we see so many puking faces at the mention of their “types”. Why? Their standard criticisms as follows –

Cheating angle –> who cheats who? We should bring up our kids with proper exposure to all ideas and teach them most of our experiences. No one can stop someone from falling in love whether they are kids, adolescents, adults, married, single, straight, old or on death bed. You just equip your kids with the knowledge to handle things as per their wish. Educate, share experiences and let your kid grow up in a smart, loving environment. They will be better off then. Do not hide your laziness while blaming it on the real fraudsters.

Divorce -> Another major criticism is that people do love marriages and end up in divorces. Even though I am not a happy person when it comes to divorce issues, but doesn’t divorce actually represents the concept of Love marriage itself? You choose who you want to be with or without! So I am not surprised by Love Marriage couples ending up in divorce. However, I do not understand the divorce in an arranged-marriage couple. Weren’t you supposed to go with it and be understanding, compassionate, “develop love” (as if it can happen always, it happens rarely), all after knotting and sleeping together? Weren’t you supposed to trust your parents and just go with it? Why the double standard? Government and others see divorce as an anti-social thing. It is not. It is the prime indicator of freedom in a society. A woman especially with kids opting for divorce represents she is bold enough not to tolerate bullshit and is equipped enough to thrive on her own with her own rules. She still has the hope in her heart to strive for a better future, greater love, sex and a wider family. So let us focus on equipping young guys and girls with such powers.

Immaturity angle -> I can handle and understand the immaturity (whatever that is) shown by young lovers. But no one should digest the immaturity shown by so called “mature” in the wake of coming up with ridiculous reasons to oppose love.

Nuisance angle -> Phew! We look at rotting rivers, open manholes, garbage dumps, few politicians, etc and turn our heads and go. We do nothing about it. But when it comes to PDA, lovers holding their hands or doing real adult stuff on public places, we all arise in unison. Protest! Damage public properties… Vote for parties which say I will not let mannequins wear underwear! What is so wrong in seeing love, showing love, exhibiting love? I still cannot comprehend.

Cause Disharmony -> Who exactly causes disharmony, the lovers? How? We should realize that couples by themselves do not sit around, plot in the darkness or hire goons to cause disharmony. It’s always their parents who do all the disharmonious things. Parents and other elders should approach any adolescent love issues, early age marriages, teen age births in matured manner (which to be honest many parents these days do – they do deal with it patiently and maturely) But however, in this case the exceptions somehow always seem to have a raised voice and better limelight regarding their digressions. Why not actual parents who have dealt with these things in real life or close quarters come up and educate others how to handle these issues in civilized manner? Once again, we find the elders of our society lacking in being proactive.

Yes! This post is a one sided argument. I scourged the web and found no one wrote what I felt at my heart and thus I restarted my blogging career from where I left off at InfyBlogs! Believe in Love, Worship only Love, Fight for Love, Teach Love, Exhibit Love, Let everything else fall and most of all please LOVE.

 

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Bye.

Mopper.

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